


ALPHA & OMEGA

by JanewayorNoWay



Category: Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: F/F, First Time, Grief/Mourning, Loss, Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-12
Updated: 2018-06-02
Packaged: 2019-04-22 02:22:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 10,009
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14298684
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JanewayorNoWay/pseuds/JanewayorNoWay
Summary: When Janeway faces a devastating loss, B'Elanna Torres helps her find her way back. Until the unexpected happens. Please read to the end of chapter 3 before getting upset.TWO NEW CHAPTERS. We finally earn the Explicit rating.





	1. OMEGA

**Author's Note:**

> This is my second fanfic. There's always this shitty anxiety right before you push the post button. I know I'm a new contributor, but I hope you'll continue to give my writing a chance. I wanted to tell a story about female friendships and female love that mirrors my own experience. I've had excellent women friends who were former partners and they have always been a great source of comfort and straight talk when I am being an asshole. I think women are amazing in the depth of their friendships. I wanted to have a story reflect my experience.

The alarm klaxons were screaming, the bridge was filled with smoke, lit only by sparking wires. A beam sliced into the deck and next to it lay Seven of Nine. Kathryn Janeway was on her knees, bent over the body, her eyes wide with horror, her mouth open in a silent scream, cradling Seven’s bloodied head, and begging the now milky eyes to flicker back to life.

That had been months ago. The Kathryn Janeway who had existed before then was gone, replaced by a ghost. A ghost who wandered the ship, locked herself in Cargo Bay 2 and refused to come out of her quarters to run the ship. 

She had been unable to reside over Seven’s services, being watched over in sick bay at the time. The Captain had been sedated to bring her wrecked mind some rest. She was haunted by the fact that she wasn’t able to tell her friend goodbye, look at her one more time, touch her beautiful pale skin. 

She kept thinking at some point she’d get better. She’d experienced loss before, and knew that, as deep as the knife edge of grief was stuck in her, eventually, it worked it’s way out, leaving only the scar. But she had not been able to do that with Seven. There was no lessening of the knife wound. It only went deeper every day. She howled and wailed many nights in her quarters, brought to her knees with agony over her loss. 

She refused entry to anyone. Until the night B’Elanna overrode her privacy lock and forced her way in. “Get out.” “No.” The Captain had whirled on her, using force to try to repel her out. B’Elanna had laughed. “Please, Captain. I’m half Klingon. You’re not strong enough to push me out that door.” 

B’Elanna’s eyes tried to adjust to the darkness, “Computer, lights to half.” She quickly surveyed the room and her Captain before she commanded the lights off again. Her quarters were a disaster. The desk had been overturned, there was a huge gash in the couch cushion, unrecycled dishes were strewn about. The most shocking image, though, was the Captain. Her hair was disheveled, her eyes were sunken. She’d lost weight. And she was wearing a stained, rumpled nightgown.

“Let me help you, Captain.”

“You’re the last person I want help from. You treated her like shit.”

B’Elanna took a deep breath. “That’s true. And I have been knocked on my ass with pain many nights, recalling what an asshole I was to someone who meant me no harm.” Her voice caught. “I’m ashamed of myself. What I did is the burden I have to live with.”

“That’s very pretty. Feel better? You can go now.”

“I don’t think you understand, Captain, I’m not leaving.” Janeway hit her comm badge, “Security to the Captain’s quarters.”

B’elanna smirked and crossed her arms. In seconds, Tuvok and an ensign, armed with phasers, charged into the Captain’s quarters. As Tuvok scanned for the security risk, he looked confused.

“Tuvok, please remove Lt Torres from my quarters. She refuses to leave.”

Tuvok dismissed the ensign, then looked at his captain. “I’m sorry, Captain, but I can’t do that.”

“Why not?!”

“She is here at the behest of myself, Chakotay and the Doctor.”

“I should strip you all of your command, toss you in the brig and drop you off at the first M Class planet.”

B’Elanna smiled, “Please do. Because then you’d have to get out of your cave and run this ship.” Before she knew it the Captain was upon her, howling with rage. B’Elanna and Tuvok held her back as B’Elanna quickly administered a hypospray. When Janeway came to, she was in her bed. Next to her, seated in a chair, was B’Elanna. 

“You traitor.” Kathryn hissed at her. 

“Is that all you’ve got?” 

“Why are you doing this?!”

“Because you’re not yourself. And who can blame you? Your soul mate was killed in a senseless, random accident.”

“She wasn’t my soul mate.”

“Okay.”

They sat staring at each other for a long time, daring each other to make their best strike.

B’Elanna spoke first. “She wasn’t your soul mate. Let’s start with that. You risked your life and the life of everyone on this ship many times to save her. She risked _her_ life several times to save this ship and everyone on it because _you_ were on it. Sometimes, she went against direct orders to save your life.”

__

“Species 8472.”

__

“She was right, you know. Your precious prime directive was probably going to get us all killed.”

__

“I know.” Her voice broke, “And I was furious with her for disobeying orders that should have been disobeyed.”

__

“Huh. I didn’t realize you knew that.”

__

“Neither did she.” Kathryn started to cry. “There are so many moments like that, B’elanna. Things I’m sorry for and I can never apologize.”

__

“And there were other unsaid things.” There was a long pause. B’Elanna continued, “You loved her.” 

__

Kathryn curled into a fetal position and sobbed. B’Elanna got out of her chair, crawled into the bed and held her. “But you never told her. You let your precious Star Fleet protocol stop you from acting on it. You laid in this bed many nights thinking of her. In the morning you put on your uniform and shut your love down and went to work trying to get 141 people back to the Alpha quadrant.”

__

“Is it pleasurable for you to dissect me like an insect?”

__

“No. But, it’s time you quit thinking that you have secrets you can’t tell anyone. Because it’s killing you. You can’t get over this alone, Kathryn.”

__

Janeway looked at her sharply - “I didn’t give you permission to use my—“

__

“I don’t give a fuck about your permission. Four months ago I would have, but, I don’t give a shit about Captain Janeway anymore. She’s not the one lost and grieving. Kathryn is. I’m here for her.”

__

“Only my friends get to see her.”

__

“What friends?”

__

She saw the hurt in Kathryn’s eyes. “You mean the people who are also your subordinates?”

__

“I’ve been a good friend to you, B’Elanna.”

__

“You’ve been a wonderful friend, Kathryn. But I’m not your friend. If I were, you could be vulnerable with me, you could have admitted your mistakes, you could have had a safe place to be weak and doubtful and afraid. You would have been able to come to me and tell me, ‘I’m in love with Seven of Nine and I don’t know what to do.’ And I could’ve said, ‘Go for it, Katie. You’re a sexy, stellar individual, we’re 30 years from home, make a happy life.’”

__

Kathryn looked at B’Elanna, tears flowing. She nodded. “I would have loved that advice.”

__

B’ELanna leaned against the headboard, pulling Kathryn close. “Tell me your secrets, Kathryn. I won’t hold any of them against you, and nothing you tell me will change the respect I’ll always have for you as my Captain. And, I’ll match you secret for secret. Because that’s what friends do.”

__

Kathryn wrapped her arms around her friend, “What would you like to know?”

__

“What’s the worst secret you’ve got?”

__

They passed the night as she confessed all her shames, her mistakes, her hidden desires. B’Elanna listened and stroked her hair. Some of the secrets made them laugh. Like how a 15 year old Janeway had practiced sex with a cucumber. “I was 15! I just wanted to be prepared.” “For what, a love affair with a salad?”

__

At some point, they fell asleep in each other’s arms.

__


	2. ALPHA

When Janeway woke up she was in clean pajamas, alone in bed. She could hear B’Elanna moving around in the next room. She felt momentarily confused, then she remembered and a sob caught in her throat. That’s why she hated sleeping, because, in the moments it took to fully come awake, she forgot Seven was dead, and always, at some point between sleeping and waking, it slammed into her. 

B’Elanna ran into her bedroom and swept her up in her arms, stroked her hair, “Cry, Kathryn.”

At the dining table, having breakfast, she held B’Elanna’s hand and cried between bites. This was what she’d been doing alone. But now it was shared. Having allowed B’Elanna to see her truths didn’t dull the grief, but, it did move it forward, and having a witness to how much she loved Seven made that love real. Something she desperately needed.

“I can’t be on duty today, B’Elanna.”

“No one expects you to.”

“I appreciate you staying with me last night but I know you have to get back to work and to Tom.”

“I’m not going anywhere. I’m logged off duty until further notice. As for Tom, we broke up two months ago.”

Kathryn looked at her, “I’m sorry. I didn’t know.”

B’Elanna shrugged. “It was amicable. We both realized there was something missing and decided to move on.”

Kathryn nodded. “So, what’s the plan?”

“I’m hoping to get you back in your uniform today. Whether we leave your quarters or not.”

Kathryn dropped her head in her hands, her voice thick with pain: “I don’t deserve that uniform.”

“Okay. What about the pants? Do you deserve the pants?”

Kathryn laughed. 

“I said baby steps, and I meant it. You can’t put your uniform on, let’s just get you in the pants, maybe tomorrow the Starfleet bra.”

“Ugh. That fucking bra.”

B’Elanna nodded, “It’s like a torture chamber for titties.” This set off a round of giggling unfit for a starship Captain, but Kathryn needed it. 

“You’ve gotten me to laugh more in the last 24 hours than I have in months.” 

“I know. And I know this isn’t like in the movies, where, we’ve laughed a couple times and now everything’s fine. You’re going to be back in a fetal position sobbing at some point, and wanting to die again, but I’m here now, and we’ll get through it together.” She squeezed Janeway’s hand. 

Later, reading a book in only her uniform pants and a t-shirt, her door chimed. She looked to B’Elanna, panicked. “No visitors!”

“Calm down. It’s just Tuvok. He doesn’t have feelings so he won’t recognize yours.” Kathryn laughed and nodded her assent.

Tuvok entered carrying a padd. “Captain, I’m vey pleased to see you’re wearing pants.” 

“Baby steps, Tuvok.”

“I have personnel reports for you to go over.”

Janeway groaned. 

B’Elanna tried to gently nudge her, “I know it’s torture, but it’s easy and mindless, Captain. And you need to start doing the things the Captain does if we’re ever going to get you back up and running.” Janeway notice that in the presence of Tuvok, B’Elanna had switched to her title. It made her feel like she could trust B’Elanna. She had promised that what she shared with her in private as Kathryn would be kept that way. She appreciated this.

Janeway took the PADD. “I’ll look at it, Tuvok, B’Elanna’s right. ” Kathryn didn’t see the look of approval and surprise he aimed at Lt. Torres. 

“Very well, Captain” said Tuvok and he turned and left.

Kathryn was able to do a little work on the reports, while B’Elanna resolved some engineering issues remotely.

Slowly, over several weeks, B’Elanna was able to get the Captain back into her uniform. She knew the key to her recovery was continuing to push her back toward some sense of normalcy. Each day, Tuvok brought some “work” that needed to be done by the Captain. This was something they had all agreed upon earlier, when they were drafting a plan on how to get their Captain back. They would find easy, mindless tasks for the Captain to engage in, gradually increasing in difficulty and importance over time.

During this time, a deep intimacy developed between the two women. Their touches lingered a little longer, their comforting kisses strayed a little more. But it remained platonic. Kathryn was just starved for someone she could trust to see her true self. She had spent seven years always keeping a boundary. And for right now, she didn’t have the emotional strength to do that anymore. That's why she had hidden away. How would she ever command her crew again if they saw so broken? 

Janeway’s progress was bumpy. As B’Elanna had predicted, for every improvement, there were the natural setbacks of grief and regret. That’s how it was with loss. Remembering her own grief at her father leaving, B’Elanna knew it would take years before it was only a dull ache. She also knew that the sooner the Captain went back to running the ship, the more sense of stability she would have to keep her steady when the pain came. 

They had been through their longest ‘sane’ stretch yet when Kathryn had another one of her nightmares, reliving the accident. The horror of the meteor they had failed to avoid crashing into the bridge, cutting through a beam that swung and struck Seven in the head. B’Elanna heard the Captain’s screams, “Please don’t leave me! Please don’t leave me!” Words she had heard the Captain cry out on the bridge that day. She was the one who’d had to pry a desperate Janeway away from Seven, to keep her clear of falling debris. It was one of the most heart wrenching things she could remember ever having to do. She rushed into Kathryn’s bedroom, grabbed her shoulders, and pulled her into her arms. “It’s just a dream, Captain.” Kathryn woke up mid sob. “I want her back. I want her back. I want her back.” B’Elanna’s own pain caught in her throat. “I know.”

She slid into the bed and eased herself and the Captain down, pulling the covers up. She stroked her back, kissed her forehead, tenderly brushed her hair out of her face. Without even thinking, they kissed. They were both being driven by their need. B’ELanna needed to take Kathryn’s pain away, Kathryn needed to feel something good and kind again. Their kiss deepened. That night, they made love.


	3. RESURRECTION

The next morning, Kathryn woke first. She looked at the sleeping form of B’Elanna and realized with horror what she’d done. All that B’Elanna had given her, and it wasn’t enough, she had to take more. 

By the time B’Elanna woke up, Kathryn was already dressed in her uniform and working at her desk. “Oh, good morning, Kathryn.” 

“We need to talk.” 

“I assumed as much.” The Captain first replicated a breakfast for B’Elanna, then sat with her at the table. She reached across and took her hand. “I owe you an apology. I’m sorry.” 

“You don’t owe me anything, Kathryn. What we did was mutual between two consenting adults.” 

“I’m afraid I’ve become too dependent on you. And it’s time for me to start taking care of myself.” B’Elanna nodded. “I agree that you need to start being a Captain again. If you’re telling me that that’s what you’re going to do, then I absolutely can return to my own quarters and resume my own life.” Kathryn’s face twisted with pain, realizing how much she had disrupted her friend’s life. 

“No, no, no. Don’t take any guilt on. We’re friends now. And this is what friends do for friends.”

That day, Janeway returned to full duty as the Captain of her ship. As she walked onto the bridge Harry Kim shouted out, “Captain on the bridge!” And Kathryn had looked around the room to see hopeful eyes looking back at her. “I have missed you all.” “We’ve missed you, Captain,” replied Tom Paris, his own voice struggling to stay steady. She sat in her Captain’s chair and felt Chakotay’s hand reach over and grasp hers. She closed her own hand around his and in her best command voice called out, “Plot a course, Lt Paris.” 

B’leanna returned to Engineering and buried herself in her work, missing her roommate of the last several weeks. 

That night, B’Elanna was awakened by someone overriding her code to gain entry to her quarters. She leapt up and grabbed her bat leth, “It’s me, B’Elanna,” she heard the Captain say. “I need you.” B’Elanna instantly dropped her bat leth and crushed Kathryn with a fierce embrace. Their lips sought each other’s out hungrily. She pulled her Captain to her bed, and they exchanged moans and sighs and touches all night long.

This is how the next few weeks passed. Janeway on duty, B’Elanna on duty, and sometime in the night, they met and made love. It was always tender, and Kathryn always cried after. Over that time, it was clear that feelings were developing between them. For B’Elanna, it had started as an act of love for her friend, wanting to ease her heartache, but, somewhere along the way she’d fallen in love with her, her own loneliness having fled whenever she was with Kathryn. Something she had never known, certainly not with Tom. She didn’t know where Kathryn was at in all this, but it was clear that she had deep feelings for her half Klingon Lieutenant. The Captain had slowly come back to herself in B’Elanna’s arms and had every intention of remaining there. They both seemed happy with where they were at, and neither had any desire to stop. 

There was one remaining deep wound that the Captain still agonized over and B’Elanna had wiped her tears over it many times. It was that the Captain had not gotten to say goodbye to Seven because she’d been out of her mind with grief when her services were performed. Although she was half Klingon, B’Elanna understood this was a crucial human need. They needed a last goodbye. 

A lot had been carefully spooned out and withheld from the Captain as she was making her way back to sanity. B’Elanna decided that it was time for the Captain to know everything. And so, one night returning from a late night stroll, Captain Janeway entered her quarters to find B’Elanna and Chakotay waiting. “What’s this?” She asked B’Elanna. “There’s something you should know,” B’Elanna told her.

Inside her quarters, they all sat, Kathryn unsure of where this was going. Chakotay spoke: “When we had Seven’s services, we knew that not getting to say goodbye to her would leave a hole you could never fill.” 

“It’s true. But, it’s too late now.” 

B’Elanna shook her head. “It’s not. Chakotay and I fought Tuvok tooth and nail, and, we had Seven’s services, but the pod that jettisoned out of the airlock was empty.”

Janeway gasped, “What are you saying?”

Chakotay took a breath, “Seven’s body was placed in stasis until you recovered sufficiently to be able to see her one last time and say goodbye.”

The captain gasped as her hand flew to her mouth. Chakotay and B’Elanna tensed, waiting for the rage, the indignation. She flung her arms around B’Elanna and kissed her hard, “Thank you.” She reached her hand out to Chakotay, pulling him to her so she could wrap her arm around his waist. “Thank you.” Chakotay’s throat ached. He had known all along the secret love the Captain was holding back for Seven. He knew her heart. He knew she would never recover without a final goodbye, so he and B’Elanna overrode Tuvok’s logic to demand this be done.

The three of them walked to the stasis pod bay, Chakotay and B’Elanna protectively flanking their beloved Captain. Once inside, the two of them stood back, and allowed Kathryn to approach alone. She peered into the glass top, then collapsed on it and wept. “Open the pod, B’Elanna.” “Captain?” “I need to touch her.” Chakotay wasn’t sure this was a good idea, “We don’t know how rapidly decay will begin once we open the pod, Kathryn.” “I need to touch her. To kiss her. Something I never got to do.” B’Elanna crossed to her and entered her code to open the lid. There was a hiss and it slowly drew up. Kathryn leaned in to touch Seven of Nine. 

Seven opened her eyes.


	4. REHABILITATION

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kathryn Janeway struggles to help Seven recover.

Seven was vaguely aware that she was in Sick Bay, she could hear the Captain and B’Elanna barking furious orders as the Doctor and Tom Paris worked on her. She seemed unable to move or speak, and her vision was impaired but she could hear. 

“How did this happen?!” 

“I just got her, Captain,” snapped the Doctor. She then felt Kathryn grasp her hand. “Seven? It’s the Captain. We thought you were dead. You’ve been in stasis for six months. Hang in there. Keep fighting, we’re going to get you well.” Then she felt the Captain’s head drop to her chest and heard her draw a ragged breath.

She also heard B’Elanna. “Captain, lets move out of the way, let the doctor do his job.” “I thought she was dead!” “We all did. Now let them do their work.”

The days came and went and Seven still seemed unable to move or focus. The Captain was constantly by her side. And the only one she would let relieve her was B’Elanna Torres, who, for some strange reason, held her hand with tenderness, spoke to her of missing her and being glad she would get a second chance.

The staff meetings now began with a progress report on Seven. The doctor believed she needed several days if not weeks of regeneration. It appeared that being in stasis had saved her, putting her human body at rest while her nanoprobes could do their work. They needed a portable regenerator in sick bay so that the doctor could oversee her recovery. B’Elanna immediately began working on it.

She assembled the unit in Sick Bay, talking to Seven the whole time, knowing it must be very hard for the young woman to not be able to move or see. Despite her feelings for the Captain, or maybe because of them, she desperately wanted Seven to return as fully as she could. She would set her own feelings aside.

Kathryn stopped coming to B’Elanna after their shift. B’Elanna had expected that. Her heart was aching, but, there was nothing she could do about it. She was the one who had called Seven the Captain’s “soul mate.” They hadn’t had any time to talk about the new situation, but she assumed, at some point, the Captain would come to her. She hadn’t fallen in love with an asshole, that much she knew. 

She was right. About a week into Seven’s recovery, the Captain showed up late one night. B’Elanna let her in and they stood awkwardly. B’Elanna offered her a drink, “Whiskey?“ “Please,” Kathryn said. B’Elanna replicated two whiskeys. They downed them in one gulp and laughed. “I hate this,” Kathryn said. “I hate that we’re awkward. I hate that there’s a distance between us.” “But, it has to be, Kathryn.” B’Elanna replicated two more whiskeys that went down just as fast as the first two. Kathryn started to move closer, “Can I hold you?” 

“I wish you would.” 

Kathryn grabbed her and pulled her into her arms. “I want to know what you’re feeling.”

“I’ll be okay, I just need time.” Kathryn drew in a breath, “I need you to know you were… you are very important to me…“ B’Elanna held up her hand, “Don’t. Anything you try to say about what I meant to you is going to cheapen what I feel for you.” Kathryn pulled her closer, “I’m so sorry.”

The Captain and B’Elanna’s friendship took a short break, so B’Elanna could give herself room to grieve the end of their relationship, but within a few weeks, they found an easy comfort again, and the friendship that B’Elanna had promised the Captain was once again there in full force. Kathryn needed her friendship now more than ever, B’Elanna knew she would need help navigating the minefield of her emotions surrounding the return of Seven.

Over the next several weeks, Seven slowly began to recover. Her sight was the first to come back, then, through regeneration and physical therapy, her strength began to return. She found it odd to be cared for by her Captain. And yet, she wouldn’t be doing as well if it had been anyone else. Janeway brought the same iron will and tenderness to Seven’s recovery as she did to her command. On the days Seven’s legs ached so badly she couldn’t move, she heard the steely voice of Janeway, “Get out of that bed, Seven.”

“I am damaged, Captain.”

“As long as you lay in that bed you are. The more you move, the less damaged you’ll be. Get up. That’s an order.”

And Seven got up. Her Captain stood two steps away, then four, then eight, her arms outstretched. Seven wanted to reach those arms. Because when she did, she was held in them and Janeway’s lips would come to her ear and whisper, “You did it, sweetheart.” An odd designation that Seven found profoundly arousing. She lived for that ‘sweetheart.’ She lived for the fire that blazed from her abdomen into her groin when the Captain said it. 

After Physical Therapy, the Captain would touch her legs, “Tell me where it hurts,” she’d say. Seven would point, and the Captain would massage the pain away. Some days, her legs didn’t hurt. But she pointed anyway. 

Her recovery was not easy nor without setbacks. These setbacks left Seven in an all-consuming despair. On those days, when the Captain came, she raged at her. “You push too hard! That is why I am making no progress! You have damaged me further!” She was shocked that Janeway would stand there and take it, never flinching. And when she had spewed all her anger out, Janeway would say, “Are you through? Or would you like to yell at me some more?” Sometimes Seven would say, “I would like to yell at you some more.” “Get it all out, Seven, because we will be doing your PT today, no matter what.” 

She hated her on those days. Arrogant, self-righteous, know it all. But, most days, she loved her so completely. Who else would come back day after day to help her, coax her, push her, after being so brutally verbally assailed?

Kathryn left those sessions completely wrung out. Pushing Seven in her physical therapy was a delicate dance between her steely command and her own heartache at seeing the woman she loved in so much pain. She often left the sessions, went immediately to her quarters and shook uncontrollably. Seven was alive. She was back. But she was broken. She was half what she was before. She knew this was tormenting Seven and her heart broke to watch her struggle, feel hopeless, give up. There was no room for her affection, her sentimentality, her love. Seven was contrary, she always had been, and now, she wanted to be hopeless and the Captain could not allow that. The only way to get her well was to command, demand and insist, and, sometimes to hold her call her ‘sweetheart’ and feel Seven’s arms around her. Although, for Seven she felt it was less out of affection and more to have something to hang onto because by the time she got to Kathryn, she could barely hold herself up.

Everything in Kathryn cried out to grab Seven, take her to her bed and never let her go. But Seven’s recovery was her number one concern. Anything that might deter her from that was not worth risking.

Finally, Seven was able to walk with the aid of a cane. There would be no more need for Kathryn’s help. Today would be their last day together. Kathryn wasn’t expecting the heartache at no longer seeing Seven every day, holding her in her arms and whispering in her ear. 

They were in the corridor outside mess hall. It was Seven’s first walk on a different deck than the sick bay. The Captain seemed to have planned a long last walk. She looked up to see her beloved Captain walking backward, her arms outstretched in case she needed to catch Seven. Seven wobbled slightly as she made her way forward. She suddenly felt a shooting pain up her right leg. She gasped and leaned against the wall, wincing. Kathryn leapt to her aid, “Are you in pain?” 

“It is minor, Captain. I am frustrated with the slowness of my progress. I am unused to these sensations.” 

“You were dead, Seven. I’m guessing no one knows the recovery time from that.” They looked at each other for a moment, the Captain smiled at her. “Can you continue?” Seven nodded and Janeway began walking backward again, while her beautiful ex-Borg clumsily, but bravely, made her way forward. As they approached the mess hall, Seven could see tears gather in her Captain’s eyes. “Captain? Are you damaged?” Kathryn shook her head, “I’m so proud of you, Seven.”

“Cease your movements,” Seven commanded. Kathryn stopped. Seven slowly moved closer. When they were inches apart, Seven wrapped her arms around Kathryn, leaned down and whispered, “I could not have done it without you, sweetheart.” She felt a sharp intake of breath from her Captain. They stood that way for a moment, then Janeway pulled herself away, “We have to keep moving, Seven.” They separated and Kathryn stood back to let Seven cross the threshold to the mess hall first. The doors slid open to reveal it was packed with crew and officers. A loud cheer went up, startling Seven. Kathryn braced her to keep her steady. Neelix came forward holding a large cake with the words “Welcome Back Seven of Nine.” Seven was uncomfortable, “Thank you, Neelix. But I do not care for cake.” 

Kathryn smiled, “I know. That’s why this is made of ice cream.” 

Seven’s eyes widened in wonder, “You can make cake from ice cream?” Neelix nodded. With that, Seven was surrounded by well-wishers as Kathryn helped her cut the first slice. 

That was the last time the Captain assisted Seven.


	5. RESTORATION

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took so long, but this is where I earn the E rating! Seven finds out what the Captain has been withholding from her.

Eventually, Seven recovered and went back to work full time in Astrometrics. Thankfully, there was a lot to do since she had been away, so she could bury the ache of missing Janeway in her work. The Captain had transferred two ensigns to her department to aid her in bringing it back up to Seven’s exacting standards. Ensign Laraby, a Bolian, was competent but he chattered endlessly and he lacked inspiration. Ensign Oben Ky, who was half Bajoran was more than competent, she was comfortable working with the Borg in silence, and possessed a natural mind for the work. Ensign Laraby’s attentions to Ensign Oben were another annoyance Seven grew tired of. She finally shut him down when he approached the ensign for the fourth time, “Hey, Ky, what are you doing tomorrow night? There’s a party in the mess hall and—“ “Ensign Laraby,” Seven icily cut in, “Please address Ensign Oben by her proper designation while on duty. And cease your unwanted attentions.” His mouth fell open and flapped like a fish. “Unwanted? I don’t think so.” Ensign Oben stepped next to Seven, “Actually, they are. You’re a little dense, Ensign Laraby.” Seven handed him a padd,”You are to report to Engineering for the remainder of your duties. I have informed Lt Torres that you are insufficient in Astrometrics, she is not looking forward to your help. I suggest you work harder, talk less, and keep your eyes above Lt Torres’ breasts, she won’t be as patient as Ensign Oben and myself.” Ensign Laraby practically flew out of Astrometrics horrified to have been caught with his wandering eye. 

Seven turned to Ensign Oben, “I… apologize, Ensign, for not acting sooner.” 

“It’s fine, Seven. I can handle myself. But I appreciate the support.” Seven nodded and turned back to the console. She was aware that Ensign Oben was considered attractive and had watched her receive the same sort of stares that Seven was familiar with. It had been informative to see how this affected another person. She looked nothing like Seven. She was about the Captain’s height, with short, jet-black hair, and piercing green eyes. Proportionally she was quite aesthetically pleasing. Until she had been transferred into Astrometrics, Seven had not even known of her. Apparently she had been buried below deck working on the plasma relays.

********

B’Elanna was in the mess hall, watching Seven at a table with a variety of crewmembers who seemed to have come to appreciate the Borg after her death, much like B’Elanna had. Where they had seen a cold ice queen, they now saw a child who had been stunted by 18 years of service to the Borg. Patience was required, and, as B’Elanna had discovered, chronic forgiveness was also a quality you had to exercise with Seven. Her cold assessments, right or wrong could be enraging. B’Elanna had developed a workaround for these encounters. When Seven started a sentence with, “You are wrong,” or “You will fail,” B’Elanna reminded herself, “She’s three years old.”

The one thing B’Elanna had not seen was any difference in Seven’s relationship with the Captain. As Seven’s table emptied, she used the opportunity to slide across from her and find out what was going on. “Hey, Seven. How are you doing today?” 

“I am much improved, Lieutenant. I appreciate all you did for me during my recovery.” 

“Well, if I didn’t say it enough while you were semi conscious, I apologize for the way I acted with you before.” 

“Apology accepted, Lieutenant, but, you have more than made up for it.”

“You seem to have gained some new friends since your death and recovery.”

“Perhaps I should die more often,” she grinned slyly.

B’Elanna laughed, “Please don’t. We need you.” B’Elanna thought she might as well jump right in, “So, how are things with you and the Captain?” 

“The Captain is very good to me. She was a most competent nurse.” 

“And since your recovery?” 

Seven furrowed her brow, “I am in no need of nursing and the Captain has a ship to run.”

B’Elanna couldn’t believe it. Kathryn had still not told Seven how she felt. My god that woman was the most infuriating human in the Delta Quadrant, in all the quadrants. “Seven, how do you feel about the Captain?” Seven looked guilty, “She is my friend and my mentor.” 

“Is there anything more?” The long silence she was met with while Seven stared at the floor, struggling with feelings she felt weren’t appropriate, gave her the answer.

“You need to tell the Captain.”

“She has never indicated that she has these same feelings for me.”

“Oh for Kahless sake, she loves you, you dimwitted Borg!”

Seven’s eyes flew open, “What? How do you know this?”

That’s when B’Elanna realized that no one had told Seven what had happened to Kathryn during the six months she thought Seven was dead. B’Elanna proceeded to fill her in on Kathryn’s breakdown and subsequent recovery. Seven was up and out of the mess hall without even telling B’Elanna goodbye.

********

Seven had been standing at the Captain’s door for one minute and forty-two seconds. Janeway had not answered. Seven became concerned - she knew the Captain was in her quarters, having inquired as she left the mess hall. Making a decision, she firmed her jaw and quickly entered a Borg code to override the lock. The door slid open and Seven stepped inside. Her eyes immediately found the Captain, seated on her couch, padd still in her hand, out cold. Seven’s heart felt like it had been slashed with a thousand razors. Kathryn was not well. She was very pale, her face was gaunt, she clearly had not been eating or sleeping. The lines around her eyes and mouth had grown deeper, and there were dark circles under swollen eyes. How had Seven not noticed this until now? She had been so engrossed in her own recovery she had not given the Captain her usual acute attention. She crossed to the Captain, tenderly removed the padd from her hand. Kathryn awoke.

“Seven? What are you doing?”

“I am worried about you, Captain…” Seven began to feel something welling up inside her. She could not steady her voice, “Are you… alright, Kathryn?” Tears welled in her eyes.

Seven could have said anything and Kathryn could have sat and been her Captain, her mentor, her friend. But, the woman’s ragged voice and genuine concern were a jolt to her soul. She looked at Seven looking at her. 

“No, Seven. I am not alright.” It was almost a whisper. She looked down at her boots and brushed lint off her trousers. Keep yourself busy and your heart won’t have time to process it, she had always told herself. 

“I had not noticed until just now, but you are not the Captain Janeway I left several months ago. You cannot continue on like this, Captain.”

Kathryn shook her head, her hand went to her mouth to muffle her pain. She was unsuccessful. A sob broke through. Seven suddenly felt nauseated. Is this what seeing the one you love in pain is like? She saw the tears well up in her Captain’s eyes, as she cast her head down, ashamed to be seen so vulnerable.

Seven could not bear to watch her suffer. She strode quickly to sit beside her and gathered Kathryn in her arms. 

Kathryn had always been able to will her command mask down. It was like liquid steal, she could instantly call upon and it would surge through her veins, cooling and hardening her. It did not come. “I am broken, Seven.” There was a long pause as Seven considered this.

“Is it …because… you want me?”

Kathryn shook her head, “I don’t want you, Seven…” her voice broke, “I need you. I have never needed anyone. But I need you.”

“Why did you never tell me this, Captain?”

“Oh, Seven, it’s so complicated. When I lost you, I lost myself.”

“But, you got me back, why did you not tell me then?”

Kathryn took in a breath, “When I got you back, it was the greatest gift, but you were so critically injured, and I didn’t know if you’d come back fully. I know your heart, Seven. I knew, if I couldn’t get you back 100%, you would believe that your life was not worth living. 

“That is correct, Captain. I considered it many times in the early months of my recovery.”

“That’s why I couldn’t say anything. There was no room for what I felt. If I couldn’t get you well, I would lose you again anyway. That’s why I drove you so hard. Once you recovered, I didn’t know how you felt abut me and I couldn’t impose my feelings on you. And yet, how I felt never changed. I have been tormented by the understanding that I cannot fathom a life without you in it.” 

Seven took the Captain’s arms and placed them around her neck, pulled her legs into her lap so she could cradle her. She tugged Kathryn into her chest, resting her chin on top of her head. “I feel the same. I feel as if there is an invisible string between us, Captain. The farther away you go from me, the more it pulls on my heart.”

“Yes.” Kathryn said and leaned in to Seven to let herself be held. 

“I cannot be so far away from you anymore. It hurts too much, Captain.” She tilted Kathryn’s face up, leaned down and feathered her lips over the hers. Seven was so tender and gentle. Like she was handling a broken-winged bird. She kissed the Captain’s lips, her tears, her temple, her jaw. She moved her hands along her back to soothe her. She let Kathryn weep. “I’m sorry,” Kathryn apologized. “I must look very weak.”

“Tears are not a weakness, Kathryn. They are a symbol of the strength of your love. You are the strongest human I know. Sometimes, when the warp drive is off line I can still feel the ship moving forward by your sheer determination.”

Kathryn’s tears had stopped, her breathing had smoothed out, slowed down. Seven’s thumb gently wiped old tears from her cheeks and kissed her again. “I need to make love to you, Kathryn. Please don’t make me wait.”

Kathryn slid off her lap, offered Seven her hand and led her into her bedroom. 

Seven took advantage of the moment and grazed Kathryn’s lips with hers. A teasing, feather light kiss. She made several light passes, prickling every hair on Janeway’s body. My god. Kathryn had never been this aroused before. Her entire body was vibrating. She pulled Seven in, opened her mouth, and gently pushed her tongue past Seven’s lips. Seven was dizzy. “I am kissing Kathryn.” She thought. “She is kissing me.” 

Their hands gently roamed, memorizing each other. Everywhere Seven’s hand moved she felt a new sensation. She leaned in and kissed Kathryn again. 

Kathryn dropped her hand from Seven’s neck, brushing it down her back, over the dip and into the soft rise of Seven’s buttocks, raking her nails over her cheeks. 

“Oh,” Seven gasped into Kathryn’s mouth. She eagarly pulled up the hem of Kathryn’s tank top, slid her hands underneath, let another sigh escape as she felt Kathryn’s soft, smooth, warm skin. “Raise your arms, Kathryn.” Kathryn raised her arms and felt Seven’s soft hands slide along the side of her breasts as she pulled the top off and tossed it on the floor. Kathryn immediately returned to tasting Seven’s thick, luxurious lips while Seven tore off Janeway’s bra and let it drop.

“Someone is quite eager,” Kathryn grinned.

Seven quirked her ocular implant, “I am eager?” She pushed her hands past the waistband of Kathryn’s uniform slacks, pulled her panties away, plunged her hands between her Captain’s thighs, where her index finger zeroed in on her clitoris to begin an achingly erotic circle. Kathryn’s knees buckled, Seven gripped her, holding her up. “Point made,” Kathryn said. 

Kathryn’s fingers found the clasps on Seven’s biosuit and released it, watching as the garment seemed to lose cohesion and drop to the floor, revealing the beautiful pale breasts. Kathryn’s breath came in shaky gasps as she her hands gently cupped them, her thumbs brushing against the nipples.

Seven went rigid, so surprised by the pleasure of Kathryn’s hands on her breasts. With each aching pass Kathryn’s thumb took, Seven moaned. She picked Kathryn up, spun her around and threw her on the bed, laying on top of her, pushing their groins together. She grabbed the waist of Kathryn’s pants, “Lift your hips,” she commanded. As Kathryn complied, she pulled the uniform pants and panties off.

She proceeded to kiss her way down Kathryn’s body. When she got to her breasts, she took one into her warm mouth, her tongue expertly gliding over the nipple, pulling it to attention. Kathryn groaned, “Seven…” Seven felt a flood of moisture from the older woman soak her thigh. She moved her hand down to the soft patch of auburn curls, and let her fingers twirl in them, then her fingers dipped past the curls to feel the heat between the Janeway’s thighs. When she delicately traced her finger around Kathryn’s folds, and felt Kathryn’s wet arousal, she moaned, then collapsed her head onto Kathryn’s shoulder. She had never felt any of these things before. They were all in the category she had previously dubbed “irrelevant.” She felt weak, overpowered by their intensity.

Kathryn gently twisted her on her side, so they were facing each other. “Are you, okay?” She asked. Seven nodded. “Are we going too fast?” Seven shook her head no. 

Kathryn chuckled, “Can you use words?” Seven nodded, “It is too much and not enough at the same time.” Kathryn nodded, “I know.” Seven’s bright blue eyes fixed on her, “You feel the same?” 

Kathryn nodded, “It’s overwhelming…. how wet I am, how willing I am, how aroused I am, no one has ever made me feel like this.”

“No one?” Kathryn shook her head.

Seven grinned, “Then I must proceed.” She lifted Kathryn’s leg, settling it on her hip, her long arms reaching down between her thighs, her soft fingers caressing her folds. Looking directly in Kathryn’s eyes, Seven slipped her finger inside the woman she loved. Kathryn closed her eyes and moaned. “More,” she whispered. “I need more of you inside me.” Seven complied, and ever so slowly began to stroke deeply. Kathryn pulled Seven against her and slowly began to rock her hips in a counter rhythm to Seven’s achingly delicious strokes. 

A mist of sweat settled on them as they lay wrapped in each other’s arms, moving up and down, in and out. Kathryn did not know that the sound of her wetness and Seven’s fingers moving against her would be the most erotic sound she could hear. 

Kathryn leaned her head back and quickened the pace of her thrusting, her eyes closed so she could have a crystal clear visual of Seven’s metal and flesh fingers thrusting inside her. Seven matched her movements and speed. Kathryn let out a series of staccato gasps with each thrust, “Oh… oh…oh.” Seven deftly pushed her on her back, Kathryn splaying her legs wide with want. The borg maneuvered herself between her lover’s thighs, dropped her head, put her full, red lips on the delicious nub of swollen flesh, and assailed it with her tongue. She was dizzy with the pleasure at tasting her Captain. Within seconds, she felt Kathryn cry out, arch up, and shudder violently under her tongue. She slowed her pace, giving Kathryn a series of smaller orgasms until she was completely spent. 

Seven didn’t want to leave the perfection of what she had just discovered. Kathryn’s folds like warm silk, her smell the essence of her beautiful lover. “This is Kathryn. This is my Captain. Only I will know this scent from now on. It is only for me.” She heard a sob from somewhere and instantly pulled herself up to find Kathryn crying uncontrollably. “Kathryn? Have I damaged you?” Kathryn curled herself into Seven in answer. “Can you use your words?” She heard a sniffled laugh against her chest. “I’m just… happy.” Seven’s forehead wrinkled, she tilted the older woman’s chin up, Kathryn’s eyes still closed. “Humans cry when they are happy?” 

Kathryn let another rattling laugh out. “Yes.” She opened her eyes to look at the woman who had just given her the most amazing orgasm she’d ever experienced. Seven felt all the air go out of her lungs. “Kathryn…” she whispered “Your eyes... they are so blue.” She used her fingers to open Kathryn’s eyelids wider. “So blue…” 

“You did that.” 

“I am amazing.”

“Yes you are,” her Captain agreed. “Now, roll over, I want to see what shade of blue those gorgeous things turn when I’m through with you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I struggled with these last two chapters for a really long time. I hope you enjoy them! Kudos and comments are appreciated.


	6. DISCOVERY

The Captain and Seven slowly began to build a relationship. They didn’t hide it but they didn’t announce it either. When Captain Janeway had Seven’s Alcove moved to her private quarters, she knew most people would figure it out.

********

Seven entered the mess hall at 0200 hours to find it empty. She had been working on the Beta Shift in Astrometrics so she could map out what looked like a potential wormhole about 1500 light years away.

“Computer, replicate Nutritional Supplement formula #7.”

She took her glass of the nutrient dense drink and began to look for a straw. Apparently Neelix had put them away. She went into the kitchen, spying a box of straws on the floor. As she bent down to try to wiggle it free, she heard the mess hall doors slide open and she heard the Captain order a coffee from the replicator. Seven was about to make her presence known when the door slid open a second time and she heard the Captain address someone intimately, “Hey, babe. How are you?” “

I’m good, Kathryn. I miss you.” 

It was B’Elanna Torres. Seven hunkered down, what was going on? Why would Kathryn and B’Elanna address each other so intimately?

“Have a coffee with me? There’s no one here, we can talk,” the Captain said.

“I’d love that.” She heard the Captain order a second coffee then watched them as they moved to a darkened corner of the mess hall. 

The Captain sat on the bench along the window, and B’Elanna started to sit in an opposite chair. “No,” Kathryn said, “sit here, I want to be close to you.” 

B’Elanna smiled and moved to sit next to the Captain. The Captain easily put her arm around the Lieutenant, who just as easily cozied into her shoulder. Seven’s heart dropped. What was going on? 

She watched as Kathryn and B’Elanna sat and drank their coffees in silence for a moment. She was about to angrily storm over and confront them when she heard B’Elanna ask, “So, how are things with Seven?” 

“Wonderful.”

B’Elanna laughed. “Oh my god. You’ve got it bad.” Kathryn laughed, “I do, I’m afraid.”

“And the sex?”

“Mind blowing.” They both laughed. 

“Come on. There’s got to be something wrong.”

“She snores.”

“What?! Don’t her nanoprobes take care of that?”

“Nope. Sometimes, it’s like a cat purring, and other times it’s like a warp core breeching.”

Seven was indignant over these observations. Surely she did not snore. 

“But you have each other now.”

“Yes. Thank you for that, B’Elanna.”

“I promised you that I’d be your friend, and god knows you need one, you’re kind of a fuck up in the romance department.”

Kathryn grinned, “And what about you? What’s going on in your love life?”

“I’m not ready yet.”

“It’s been months, B’Elanna. Are you saying you’re still in love with me?”

Still in love? Seven stopped breathing to hear the reply.

B’Elanna sighed, “I’m not pining for you, if that’s what you’re worried about, but, it’s just hard to find someone who can live up to you.”

“To me? Or Toby the Targ?”

B’Elanna gasped, “I told you that in confidence!”

“You told your parents you wanted to marry a stuffed toy!”

“I was three! I was in love!”

They laughed.

“I’ve tried to date, Kathryn,” B’Elanna said, “But, Kahless, it’s so incestuous. Everyone has fucked everyone. I mean, it’s a very small pool.”

“Maybe we could stop at an M Class planet and pick up a dozen lesbian aliens for you to choose from.”

B’Elanna laughed, “You would do that for me?”

“We’re friends, B’Elanna.” 

Seven sat and watched as they talked about various subjects for a few more minutes, then they recycled they’re coffee mugs and exited.

********

Over the next few days, Seven tried to process what she had seen. She thought she should feel betrayed, but she was confused. She didn’t understand what she had witnessed. She had seen an intimacy between the two women that she couldn’t classify. An intimacy and an ease that she did not share with Kathryn. Maybe, if all she had witnessed was a friendship, she would have been fine, but, Kathryn had mentioned B’Elanna being in love with her. Seven knew a great deal had happened while she had been presumed dead, what had Kathryn not told her?

Seven began to do a little investigating, and what she discovered devastated her. She would not allow this to continue. She set a plan in motion.

********

Kathryn came home one night to find Seven cooking up a storm and B’Elanna seated at the table, sipping wine.

“Hi, B’Elanna. What’s this, sweetheart, did I forget we were doing this?” 

“No, Kathryn. I merely wished to invite B’Elanna for dinner. I wished to thank her for everything she has done for you and for I.”

“That’s’ really thoughtful, Seven.” She kissed her. “You’ve become such a thoughtful person.”

“If you will sit, Kathryn, I will serve and we can get started.”

Kathryn cheerfully obliged, Seven dished out her perfect al dente pasta and the three of them tucked eagerly into their meal.

“This is delicious, Seven.”

“Thank you B’Elanna. So… I was wondering when you and Kathryn were going to tell me that you copulated.”


	7. FRIENDSHIP

“Thank you B’Elanna. So… I was wondering when you and Kathryn were going to tell me that you copulated.”

Forks of penne stopped in mid air. Kathryn and B’Elanna exchanged panicked looks.

“Seven,” came Kathryn’s ‘Captain’ voice, “Enough. This is something you and I should discuss in private. There’s no need to put B’Elanna through this.”

“I am not upset that you copulated.”

“Oh, well, that’s a relief, what’s for dessert?” snapped B’Elanna.

“Kathryn, B’Elanna, please, do not be upset. This was not something that could be discussed in private, Kathryn, because I am tired of the secrets that have been kept between you and B’Elanna and from me. It is most efficient to have all parties together at the same time to clear this up.”

Seven reached out and gently held both Kathryn’s and B’elanna’s hands. “I wish only to help your friendship and to help B’Elanna find love.”

Kathryn and B’Elanna exchanged looks. 

“I’m not really comfortable with this, Seven,” B’Elanna stated.

“B’Elanna Torres, I am grateful to you for providing Kathryn with love and support while I was believed dead. Whatever form that took does not matter to me.”

Kathryn started to tear up, “You’re really not angry? Or disappointed in me?”

Seven shook her head. “I also understand now that B’Elanna made a great sacrifice in telling me of your feelings. Particularly after seeing you both in each other’s arms in the mess hall six days ago.”

B’Elanna’s head dropped. “We’re only friends, Seven.”

“Understood. You need each other. You have a friendship that is vital to your wellbeing and happiness. I want to honor that friendship and I believe it is our job, Kathryn, to help B’Elanna copulate—“

”Seven.” Kathryn said, “What are you… are you suggesting… a three way?”

“That’s not gonna happen, Seven.” Said B’Elanna. “I’m a vanilla gal. Well, a very horny, Klingon, vanilla gal, but I’m not into orgy level stuff.”

“Me either, sweetheart, I’m too old to try to take care of two women at once. I can barely handle you.”

“I am not suggesting a three way!” Seven snapped. “Both of you need to get your minds out of the gutter.”

“What are you suggesting?” Asked Kathryn.

Seven was stopped from answering by a chime at the door. She exhaled in frustration. “Now you have made me take too long! I have found a copulating partner for B’Elanna. She and B’Elanna have similar interests and she is also without a copulating partner.”

“This is a blind date?! QhiYah!” B’Elanna was furious.

“You don’t just pick someone off a manifest, Seven, and decide copu-- sex will happen.” Kathryn scolded.

The door chimed again. Seven crossed to answer it. 

B’Elanna was cursing Seven: “Petaq! Send her home, Seven!“

Just then, the most drop dead gorgeous Bajoran woman B’Elanna had ever seen entered the Captain’s quarters. B’Elanna stared, her mouth agape.

Seven turned to B’Elanna, “Lt Torres, This is Ensign Oben Ky.”

B’Elanna’s mouth moved but nothing came out. Kathryn turned to look at her, “B’Elanna?”

B’Elanna flashed the most brilliant smile as she stood to greet the Ensign. “Nice to meet you, Ensign Oben.”

Seven leveled an icy stare at her, “Lt Torres, I believe you were saying something about sending someone home?”

B’Elanna looked to Seven, “What? Oh. Yeah. I was talking about something else.”

Ensign Oben grinned and nodded to B’Elanna, “It’s nice to finally meet you Lieutenant. Your reputation as the world’s greatest engineer precedes you.”

B’Elanna made a funny strangled laugh, “Stop! You!” Seven and Kathryn both stared at her. They’d never heard those sounds come out of B’Elanna before.

“And you know Captain Janeway.” Seven nodded toward Kathryn.

“Captain.” nodded the Ensign. 

Seven turned to B’Elanna and Kathryn, “I invited the Ensign for dessert. Please, have a seat, Ky.”

Ensign Oben complied, sitting between the Captain and B’Elanna. Seven served the Key Lime Pie she’d made from scratch. “This is Kathryn’s favorite dessert. Key Lime Pie, please, enjoy.”

Everyone tucked into their pie, several moments of awkward silence filled the room. Seven sighed again. She was apparently going to have to do all the work. “B’Elanna, Ky is interested in your attempts to reconfigure the EPS taps.”

“Yes, Lt. Torres, it sounds fascinating.”

“You can call me B’Elanna, while we’re off duty, Ensign. Yes, because the EPS tap has to convert the warp power to electricity, the energy needed to convert is almost double. I was thinking we could configure the EPS taps to use power direct from the warp core without converting, but it’s a tricky problem and every test of the system just shuts it down.“

“Really? Have you done the McReady Algorithm flow test?”

“I never even thought of that. How would that work?“

“The algorithm allows you to regulate the flow. Maybe you’re just overloading the relays.”

As B’Elanna and Ky began to sketch out ideas on a napkin, Seven cleared dishes. Kathryn crossed to her in the kitchen.

“Where did you find her?” Kathryn asked.. “How did you know it would work?”

“She transferred into Astrometrics a few months ago. As to knowing it would work, she is highly intelligent, extremely kind, very attractive, and has not been with anyone else on Voyager.” 

“She’s a virgin?”

“Kathryn, people had sex before they came to work on this ship. Like you, she had someone at home who moved on when she believed Voyager was gone. Like B’Elanna, she has been wary of the small group of women who regularly exchange partners. Also, like B’Elanna, she is horny.”

“What?! How do you know all this?”

“I asked her.”

Kathryn’s mouth fell open. “You can’t just ask people those things.”

Seven shrugged, “I find your way of getting information by never saying anything and avoiding talking about the very topic you are most interested in to be inefficient. In the spirit of this open communication, I shared with Ensign Oben that B’Elanna is also horny and to not be shy.”

********

B’Elanna and Ky were at the door, saying their goodbyes. “Thank you, Seven, it was a wonderful evening.”

As soon as they were gone, Kathryn grabbed Seven and pulled her in to the deepest kiss. 

“What was that for?”

“Being so smart.” Kathryn leaned in and delivered another deep kiss. Seven moaned. “Kathryn…”

********

In the corridor, B’Elanna and Ky laughed and chatted easily. “Ky, Would you be up for a nightcap? I’ve got some excellent Bajoran plum wine.”

“That would be nice, B’Elanna.”

They reached B’Elanna’s quarters, she keyed in her code and as the doors opened, she was grasped, thrust into the living room, pushed against the bulkhead and thoroughly kissed. B’Elanna was instantly wet. Ky’s lips pressed into hers and they both moaned, opening their mouths to let each other in. Their hands wandered freely, Ky’s moved up to B’Elanna’s breasts. “Oh. Oh.” B”Elanna gasped. “That feels so good.”

“Oh my god, B’Elanna, I’ve been wanting to do this for so long…”

EPILOGUE

The Captain, B’Elanna and Ensign Oben were seated around the dinner table, laughing so hard they’d run out of sound. B’Elanna’s fingers were entwined in Ky’s to her right, and to her left, her hand grasped the Captain’s shoulder in affection. Seven felt great satisfaction. She had never seen Kathryn laugh so hard or be so freely herself. That is why she knew, when she saw what she did in the mess hall, that she must bring the secrets out so B’Elanna and Kathryn’s friendship could thrive. And it was why she needed to find a worthy love for B’Elanna. What she had sacrificed to keep Kathryn sane and put her back in the arms of the woman she loved was a favor Seven felt she needed to reciprocate.

She smiled. If this was Humanity, she would gladly adapt.

**Author's Note:**

> A lot of what I've written comes from my own life, my own grief when my mother died a year ago. I did throw myself on her in the hospital bed and beg her not to leave me. I did wake up screaming "I want her back," at 3 in the morning. My wife held me in her arms until she had to get up and go to work. I did enter a year long depression where I was unable to do anything. When you lose someone so crucial to your identity, you do kind of lose your mind. Before I lost my mother, I never could have written anything like this, because I had no clue how absolutely devastating such a loss could be.


End file.
